Oh that’s so not the way…

Everyone has bizarre tweets.  Deep down inside we know it’s simply spamming at it’s finest.  A random tweet – mostly the most offhanded ones – can grab the attention of anyone.  My first random ReTweet was when I tweeted about using a Lisa Frank note book with a unicorn. I then got followed by a website that promises to provide unicorns and rainbows online.

Another time I tweeted about a migraine.  A woman replied back to me who evidently represents some company that provides natural cures for headaches and proceeded to tell me some  ingredients that would cure me.

However, the following tops it all.

Here is what happened:

tonight’s free wireless hub of choice – Cafe Mestizo on 18th St.. Efebos Cafe was down. i lost faith in my favorite Mexican Cafe8:09 PM Jul 22nd from web

DarthVader_@My_name_is_Reb I find your lack of faith disturbing.8:14 PM Jul 22nd from API in reply to My_name_is_Reb

I wouldn’t be so disturbed if my family didn’t have a long history with Star Wars.  We have 4 versions of the original three movies: one on VHS recorded off of TV by my parents, a 3-video set offered in 1998, a Collectors edition with deleted scenes of the same three video set offered in 2000, and finally – the same three movies on DVD.  We have a Star Wars Monopoly game, puzzles galore, and one Christmas we gave my dad a Storm Trooper Cookie Jar.

Darth Vader found me on Twitter.  A coincidence?  What if the Star Wars saga was true?  What if even Darth Vader is social savvy enough to have a Twitter?  Considering the Dark Side, anything is possible.  If Ashton Kutcher can be on Twitter, what other evils can be expected?


Evidently, Naked Cowboy/ Robert Burck is running for major of New York City thanks to an online branding agency called Blackwave Creative. As surprising as this is, a quick Google search provides interesting information: he has a degree in political science, a stimulus plan, and claims to know more about NYC than anyone else – who else has spent a decade in Times Square?  While everyone from Perez Hilton to TMZ has their opinion about the potential candidate, I have two points I want to make clear.

  1. Spending ten years in Time Square does not count as time spent understanding NYC.  I avoid Times Square, loathe it even.  The most time I have spent in Times Square was when I walked from Penn Station to 54th & 6th Ave while interning for Rubenstein Associates, Inc. last spring.  The afternoons were terrible, fighting with other commuters to get on the earliest train.  On the weekends, it is a different sort of battle: fighting against tourists in order to walk at a decent pace.  In conclusion, that is only two demographics: slow tourists + angry commuters.  Not enough diversity given the size of NYC.
  2. I will take this time to remind you all about a certain, scandalous assault that took place in February of last involving myself. That is me with a face full of confusion and fear.  Part of me is secretly hoping that this photo will be discovered during the middle of his future campaign and everyone will want to know who the poor girl in the middle is with such a genuine expression of shock.  This blog will be famous due to my keen reporting of the tyrannies that occur in NYC.  This photo alone has BLOWN up on my Facebook page with multiple comments from friends and concerns from family members.  My mother even emailed me concerning the news about Naked Cowboy’s quest for Mayor-dom, just in case I had not found out yet.  My sister and I were watching terrible TV on E! when the “news break” featured Naked Cowboy.  My heart started beating wildly, my brow in a sweat.  I knew no good (or some good) would come out once the above photo was discovered.

Other than that, it’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood.

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